Woo doggy!

It was an important night on the Rock of Love Bus with Bret Michaels*.

We started the night on a group date, playing a high energy game of tube-top ice hockey, a baby doll standing in for the puck. Unfortunately, Melissa was body checked by an opposing team member and the impact caused her implant to leak. But don't worry, she was well enough to make it on her three way date later that evening.

Together with Beverly, Brittaney (don't confuse here with Brittanya) and Maria, Melissa went with Brett in the Rock of Love Bus for a romantic evening at Big Al's, the best strip joint in the South. Brittaney and Melissa used to be strippers, see, so they got their moment to shine up on stage. Beverly wasn't impressed, though, I think because she was worried her three kids might see her on TV with her hoo-hoo on parade. Although Brett "doesn't like to pressure girls into doing what they don't want to do" he thinks Beverly is being a big of a "buzz kill".

Needless to say, Melissa had a bit too much to drink and when she got back on the bus she drunk dialed her BOYFRIEND to tell him she thought Brett Michael's had hair extensions... That maybe his hair wasn't real.

Well. Gasp, etc.!

The other girls took the moment to further their own interests and immediately informed Brett of Melissa's infidelity and lack of commitment to the Love Bus. He called her on it. She said she felt he didn't appreciate her. He said "we haven't even had sex yet" so why were they wasting time being so serious? Why can't they just have fun? She made some important points about how the leaking silicone might be impairing her judgement, and they agreed to continue "rocking each other's worlds".

But Melissa got punked, because Brett called her on her lies in the middle of the backstage pass ceremony! Oh snap! Yes he did! Surprisingly, Brett chose buzz kill Beverly to continue the tour, as well as Taya, whom Brett said he needed more time with because all he knew about her was the she was Brazilian and drank too much. But poor Brittaney was sent packing. He said he thought she was stealing the other girls socks, and although he enjoyed her porn films, she wasn't the rocker girl for him.

*I watched this show for research purposes. I am a true journalist, digging for the facts, and reporting on the stories that matter to you.